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Cat/Griz week=good Smack
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 1:57 pm
by rtb
So it is Cat/Griz week, this is when Smalk talk is supposed to be fun and entertaining. This is where we jab each other in the ribs a little and have fun joking around, not all the other garbage that gets tossed in here. So, what do you say, can the Grizzlies avoid another flop after this weekend's stellar performance?
So I will start the jabs with a harmless little joke.
Why did the UM Graduate go around the same block 24 times while attempting to deliver a Pizza?
His blinker was stuck.
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 2:17 pm
by GOKATS
The owner of a golf course in Missoula was confused about paying an
invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical
help.
He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from The
University of Montana and I need some help. If I were to give you
$20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"
The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything but my
earrings."
You gotta love those Grizzly women.
************************************************************************
A senior at U. of M. was overheard saying... "When the end of the
world comes, I hope to be in Montana." When asked why, he replied
he'd rather be in Montana because everything happens in Montana 20
years later than in the rest of the civilized world.
****************************************************************
The young man from UM came running into the store and said to
his buddy, "Pardner, somebody just stole your car from
the parking lot!"
"Damn," He replied, "Did you see who it was?
The young man answered, "Naw, I couldn't tell, but I got the
license number."
***********************************************************************
A Montana State trooper pulled over a UM student on I-90. The trooper
asked, "Got any ID?"
The driver replied, "'bout whut?"
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 3:41 pm
by Swilly3224
boobcats suck
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 3:44 pm
by whitetrashgriz
bearBAC wrote:Dennis arrived at his Accounts Office (who is a Bobcat) for an audit accompanied by another man .
Going over his records, the accountant said, "Well, sir, it appears that you live at a much higher level than your reported income. How do you explain that?"
Dennis replied, "I love to gamble and I always win."
The skeptical official gave him a disbelieving look.
"I can prove it," said Dennis. "How about a demonstration?"
The bobcat thought a moment and said, "Okay. Go ahead."
Dennis said, "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye."
The bobcat thought a moment and said, "No way! It's a bet!"
Dennis removed his glass eye and bit it.
The bobcat's jaw dropped. Dennis said, "Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye."
The bobcat could tell Dennis wasn't blind, so he took the bet.
Dennis then removed his dentures and bit his good eye.
The stunned bobcat was now three grand in the hole!
"Want to go double or nothing?" Dennis asked. "I'll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on your desk and piss into that wastebasket by the door over there and never get a drop anywhere in between."
The bobcat, twice burned, was cautious now, but there's no way this guy could manage that stunt, so he agreed again!
Dennis climbed up on the bobcat's desk, missed the wastebasket completely, and pretty much got pee all over the desk.
The bobcat grinned. He had just turned a huge loss into a huge win! But then he noticed that Dennis's EW Eagle friend looked ashen and was visibly shaking.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
The EWU Eagle replied, "Not really, Yesterday, Dennis bet me twenty thousand dollars he'd piss on your desk and you'd be happy about it."
whoa whoa whoa whoa! wait a minute? a quality post bearbac? something funny? wait! no KitTy? no mEdiOCre? no KoOLaiD? what is the deal? are you ok? mods, maybe you should put a sticky on this just to remind us, and mainly him, that he just might be capable of normal smack. amazing. i better go lay down!
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 3:47 pm
by rtb
Swilly3224 wrote:boobcats suck
See swilly this isn't good smack. bearBAC finally posts something funny and creative after 1000 posts of stupidity and this is all you've got? If you can't think of anything 1/2 way unique or funny just don't post. Although if that were a rule for the Grizzlies in general you guys wouldn't ever do a damn thing!
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 3:58 pm
by MSUCATS
Dennis arrived at his Accounts Office (who is a Bobcat) for an audit accompanied by another man .
Going over his records, the accountant said, "Well, sir, it appears that you live at a much higher level than your reported income. How do you explain that?"
Dennis replied, "I love to gamble and I always win."
The skeptical official gave him a disbelieving look.
"I can prove it," said Dennis. "How about a demonstration?"
The bobcat thought a moment and said, "Okay. Go ahead."
Dennis said, "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye."
The bobcat thought a moment and said, "No way! It's a bet!"
Dennis removed his glass eye and bit it.
The bobcat's jaw dropped. Dennis said, "Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye."
The bobcat could tell Dennis wasn't blind, so he took the bet.
Dennis then removed his dentures and bit his good eye.
The stunned bobcat was now three grand in the hole!
"Want to go double or nothing?" Dennis asked. "I'll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on your desk and piss into that wastebasket by the door over there and never get a drop anywhere in between."
The bobcat, twice burned, was cautious now, but there's no way this guy could manage that stunt, so he agreed again!
Dennis climbed up on the bobcat's desk, missed the wastebasket completely, and pretty much got pee all over the desk.
The bobcat grinned. He had just turned a huge loss into a huge win! But then he noticed that Dennis's EW Eagle friend looked ashen and was visibly shaking.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
The EWU Eagle replied, "Not really, Yesterday, Dennis bet me twenty thousand dollars he'd piss on your desk and you'd be happy about it."
ROFLMAO!! That was a GREAT POST by bearBAC! I really did LOL! What happened to you? Fall in a well? Get kicked by a mule? I'm at a loss for words!
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 4:02 pm
by Barnbat
Anyone like to post some Danish Cat / Griz cartoons to keep things light??
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 4:05 pm
by LimpKitty
His life partner must have "put out" this weekend.
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 4:21 pm
by rtb
Well, the one funny post was good while it lasted. I am back to square one with our "friend".
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 4:45 pm
by catamaran
Where would a UM grad get $10 unless they just got done delivering pizzas
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 4:51 pm
by rtb
catamaran wrote:Where would a UM grad get $10 unless they just got done delivering pizzas
This is what this board is for. Nice work.
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 5:56 pm
by catamaran
How do you pee on your hands when you all squat?
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 6:02 pm
by MaZooLaGriz
rtb wrote:This is what this board is for.
Oh baby... are you gonna' get quoted on that for a looooong time.
By the way, C@'s suck.
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 6:16 pm
by MSUCATS
How do you pee on your hands when you all squat?
Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2006 6:28 pm
by rtb
MaZooLaGriz wrote:rtb wrote:This is what this board is for.
Oh baby... are you gonna' get quoted on that for a looooong time.
By the way, C@'s suck.
Because I pointed out the the smack board is intended for good quality smack?
Look at bearBAC he has figured out how to copy and paste funny jokes then you bring the weak C@'s suck? I thought people from a dance school would be more creative than that!