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Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 7:57 am
by rfischer94
It's that time of year again when Joe Cravens cracks us all up with his folksy sayings. I started a list last year; am I missing any?


Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 8:17 am
by Desert_Bobcat
I hope I’m not going out on a limb here when I say that I think Cravens “shtick” is corny and a little stale. I’ve watched enough games he’s called the last few years to hear him recycle all his “go-to’s” more than a few times. Every game it’s the same thing.
Not only that but I think his whole persona paints the BigSky in a bad light. Don’t get me wrong, he was a good basketball coach and probably deserves that spot on Weber’s broadcast, but do we really want him being the unofficial “voice” of the BigSky tournament? His commentary would fit in just fine if I was sitting next to him belly up to the bar in dusty west Texas town, not on a tv broadcast. Maybe I just want someone who presents themself a bit more professional (whatever that means).

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:15 am
by Common Cat
“Probably can’t jump over a small town phone book.”

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:23 am
by MSU01
I'll take Joe Cravens and his corny one-liners any day over Krista "Have I mentioned I used to play for the Lady Griz?" Redpath on the women's broadcast.

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:52 am
by rfischer94
MSU01 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:23 am
I'll take Joe Cravens and his corny one-liners any day over Krista "Have I mentioned I used to play for the Lady Griz?" Redpath on the women's broadcast.
I don't understand why folks dislike Redpath so much. I don't hear her talk about her tone at Montana that often and she does good color commentary. I also think she's very honest about what each team is doing well and what they're not doing well. Am I missing something?

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 12:10 pm
by BelgradeBobcat
Common Cat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:15 am
“Probably can’t jump over a small town phone book.”
That was a new one for me. Loved it...what's a phone book? :lol:

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 12:17 pm
by coloradocat
Desert_Bobcat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 8:17 am
I hope I’m not going out on a limb here when I say that I think Cravens “shtick” is corny and a little stale. I’ve watched enough games he’s called the last few years to hear him recycle all his “go-to’s” more than a few times. Every game it’s the same thing.
Not only that but I think his whole persona paints the BigSky in a bad light. Don’t get me wrong, he was a good basketball coach and probably deserves that spot on Weber’s broadcast, but do we really want him being the unofficial “voice” of the BigSky tournament? His commentary would fit in just fine if I was sitting next to him belly up to the bar in dusty west Texas town, not on a tv broadcast. Maybe I just want someone who presents themself a bit more professional (whatever that means).
Professionalism doesn't get clicks. People don't watch Gus Johnson clips because he accurately describes what happening on the field/court. Same here.

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 12:38 pm
by Desert_Bobcat
coloradocat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 12:17 pm
Desert_Bobcat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 8:17 am
I hope I’m not going out on a limb here when I say that I think Cravens “shtick” is corny and a little stale. I’ve watched enough games he’s called the last few years to hear him recycle all his “go-to’s” more than a few times. Every game it’s the same thing.
Not only that but I think his whole persona paints the BigSky in a bad light. Don’t get me wrong, he was a good basketball coach and probably deserves that spot on Weber’s broadcast, but do we really want him being the unofficial “voice” of the BigSky tournament? His commentary would fit in just fine if I was sitting next to him belly up to the bar in dusty west Texas town, not on a tv broadcast. Maybe I just want someone who presents themself a bit more professional (whatever that means).
Professionalism doesn't get clicks. People don't watch Gus Johnson clips because he accurately describes what happening on the field/court. Same here.
And here’s where I talk out of both sides of my mouth a bit. I really enjoy a Gus Johnson call and I think any game where Bill Walton on the call is must-watch tv. What those guys, and many others, bring are entertaining stories and high sports IQ. Cravens probably has that too but he’s so worked up about playing the hits and talking about his glory days (when Moby Dick was a minnow) that we never get any substance. It’s all just fluff

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 1:01 pm
by Joe Bobcat
rfischer94 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:52 am
MSU01 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:23 am
I'll take Joe Cravens and his corny one-liners any day over Krista "Have I mentioned I used to play for the Lady Griz?" Redpath on the women's broadcast.
I don't understand why folks dislike Redpath so much. I don't hear her talk about her tone at Montana that often and she does good color commentary. I also think she's very honest about what each team is doing well and what they're not doing well. Am I missing something?
She has improved immensely from how she was 3 or 4 years ago. Back then she would routinely talk incessantly about the past Gris teams, players, coaches... and if there was any player who had a parent that played for the Gris she gave a full family history.... Any player who didn't have that Gris background barely got mentioned in any way, going so far as to hardly comment on their play in the game at hand. Consider yourself lucky if you didn't have to endure her announcing back then.

Now her time is spent far more on the game and she shows that she has researched each player and team somewhat. A bit of her bias comes out when the Gris are playing but it's nothing like it used to be. All in all she's okay now, and I was a huge critic of her announcing years ago.

Since this thread is about Joe Cravens I'll add that he overuses his one liners but he's tuned into the game and can give good commentary as well.

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 1:04 pm
by catscat
Common Cat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:15 am
“Probably can’t jump over a small town phone book.”
Brought a jackknife to a sword fight.

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 1:10 pm
by catscat
Joe Bobcat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 1:01 pm
rfischer94 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:52 am
MSU01 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:23 am
I'll take Joe Cravens and his corny one-liners any day over Krista "Have I mentioned I used to play for the Lady Griz?" Redpath on the women's broadcast.
Since this thread is about Joe Cravens I'll add that he overuses his one liners but he's tuned into the game and can give good commentary as well.
Regardless of what anyone thinks about his commentary, I submit his "block, charge" video has to be a classic.

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 2:40 pm
by rfischer94
Joe Bobcat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 1:01 pm
rfischer94 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:52 am
MSU01 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 10:23 am
I'll take Joe Cravens and his corny one-liners any day over Krista "Have I mentioned I used to play for the Lady Griz?" Redpath on the women's broadcast.
I don't understand why folks dislike Redpath so much. I don't hear her talk about her tone at Montana that often and she does good color commentary. I also think she's very honest about what each team is doing well and what they're not doing well. Am I missing something?
She has improved immensely from how she was 3 or 4 years ago. Back then she would routinely talk incessantly about the past Gris teams, players, coaches... and if there was any player who had a parent that played for the Gris she gave a full family history.... Any player who didn't have that Gris background barely got mentioned in any way, going so far as to hardly comment on their play in the game at hand. Consider yourself lucky if you didn't have to endure her announcing back then.

Now her time is spent far more on the game and she shows that she has researched each player and team somewhat. A bit of her bias comes out when the Gris are playing but it's nothing like it used to be. All in all she's okay now, and I was a huge critic of her announcing years ago.

Since this thread is about Joe Cravens I'll add that he overuses his one liners but he's tuned into the game and can give good commentary as well.
Thanks for the context. I haven't been listening to her calls for very long.

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 5:30 pm
by HiLineCat
Cravens is good with his one-liners, but he'll never top Bob Green.

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 5:54 pm
by rfischer94
HiLineCat wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 5:30 pm
Cravens is good with his one-liners, but he'll never top Bob Green.
That's the truth! :lol:

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 6:02 pm
by rfischer94
He's tougher than a pine knot. Anyone who's ever split wood knows that one!

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 6:03 pm
by msu_agfan
rfischer94 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 6:02 pm
He's tougher than a pine knot. Anyone who's ever split wood knows that one!
You beat me! Lol

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 7:27 pm
by rfischer94
msu_agfan wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 6:03 pm
rfischer94 wrote:
Sun Mar 10, 2024 6:02 pm
He's tougher than a pine knot. Anyone who's ever split wood knows that one!
You beat me! Lol
I hadn't heard that one before. :lol:

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 7:29 pm
by rfischer94
Common foul, no upgrade. That's what they told me at the hotel - no upgrade. They also had to tell me no panhandling!

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 9:23 pm
by rfischer94
I would have bet my mother-in-law's car keys...

Re: Joe Cravens One-Liners Repository

Posted: Sun Mar 10, 2024 9:41 pm
by rfischer94
Staying in front of him is like trying to eat Cap'n Crunch with a canker sore :lol: