ponderables - :=)
Posted: Wed May 10, 2006 7:20 am
Ponderables
1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these
dangly things here, and drink whatevercomes out?"
2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next
thing that comes outta its rear."
3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the HOV carpool lane?
6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for thetime, but don't point to their
crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going
to look up there anyway?
8. Why does Goofy stand upright while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just
buy dinner?
10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (Think about it)
11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what
is baby oil made from?
12. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
13 Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
14. Stop singing and read on..........
15. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but
when you take him on a car ride, he stickshis head out the window?
17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
18. Do you ever wonder why you gave me your email address in the first place?
LIVE WELL...LAUGH OFTEN
1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these
dangly things here, and drink whatevercomes out?"
2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next
thing that comes outta its rear."
3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the HOV carpool lane?
6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for thetime, but don't point to their
crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going
to look up there anyway?
8. Why does Goofy stand upright while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just
buy dinner?
10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (Think about it)
11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what
is baby oil made from?
12. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
13 Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
14. Stop singing and read on..........
15. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but
when you take him on a car ride, he stickshis head out the window?
17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
18. Do you ever wonder why you gave me your email address in the first place?
LIVE WELL...LAUGH OFTEN