
I will, however, drop a few tidbits just to whet the appetite:
1. Through a little known loophole it is discovered that Travis Lulay still has one game's worth of eligibilty left. Though he is 65 years old, he has remained in surprisingly good shape over the years through diet, pilates and daily blood transfusions from young virgin boys. He starts at punter but is suffering from previously undiagnosed osteoporosis; his first (and only) punt of the game nets 2 yards and a compund fracture of the tibia/fibula. He finally gets his wish to be carried off the field, but it wasn't like he imagined.
2. With this game, Griz head coach Rob Phenicie officially passes Joe Paterno as the NCAA Division I all-time leader in "Retire Already, Mother ******". The disembodied head of President George Dennison is on hand (literally - they keep the head in a jar that some carries around in their hand) to commemorate the occasion.
3. I won't tell you who won, but it was a high scoring game. I should also mention that touchdowns are worth 58 points.
4. Cheerleaders are topless and they make out with each other to get the crowd going. It pretty much rules.