Gay Adoption

mslacat · Post by **mslacat** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 10:38 am

I have a personal interst in this topic. It is assumed that all people would go through the same screening, classes, and process.

Post by **SonomaCat** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 10:43 am

I had to choose the last one because it seems like the safest answer. Maybe instead of "no questions asked," you could change it to "subject to the same rules as a straight couple" or something that assures us that we aren't talking about just giving babies away at a drive-through (even though you do stress that in the body of your post).

mslacat · Post by **mslacat** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 11:03 am

A little back ground for those who are not aware. No I am not gay, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn. I have two adoptive children, (9 and 5 years old) originally from China. I belong/attend quite a few adoptive family groups, classes, and other things, and as a result I have quite a few friends that are adoptive parents. When I talk about adoption right now I am only talking about the area of adoption associated with bring a new child into to a family.

Talking points:
-From personal experience a gay gentleman adopting a child is very rare.

-At least from China (and a few other counrties I know of) China will adopt to a couple (man and woman) or a single woman (they do not ask about sexual oreintation). They will not adopt to single males (Gay or otherwise)

- I know of quite a few gay woman single and couple who have adopted from overseas.

-I know of few gay woman and men, single and couple who have have had children through conventional means.

-The rate of child abuse (sexual and/or otherwise) among Hetrosexual adoptions is twice that of Gay adoptions.

briannell · Post by **briannell** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:16 pm

my cousin Carol also adopted from China, oh we love Claire to death. Have many adoptee friends, and I think (because I'm mom) that it is important to have a mother in the home. I am okay with lesbians adopting, not gay male couples. I'm sexist, but men aren't maternal, we are built for children and wired for them in a way men can never be. that's why single moms can adopt, but rarely single men. just my 2 cents.

-rebecca

WYCAT · Post by **WYCAT** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:32 pm

briannell wrote:my cousin Carol also adopted from China, oh we love Claire to death. Have many adoptee friends, and I think (because I'm mom) that it is important to have a mother in the home. I am okay with lesbians adopting, not gay male couples. I'm sexist, but men aren't maternal, we are built for children and wired for them in a way men can never be. that's why single moms can adopt, but rarely single men. just my 2 cents.

-rebecca

I think the whole lesbian thing negates any maternal credit you may get for being female.

Hell's Bells · Post by **Hell's Bells** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:34 pm

WYCAT wrote:
briannell wrote:my cousin Carol also adopted from China, oh we love Claire to death. Have many adoptee friends, and I think (because I'm mom) that it is important to have a mother in the home. I am okay with lesbians adopting, not gay male couples. I'm sexist, but men aren't maternal, we are built for children and wired for them in a way men can never be. that's why single moms can adopt, but rarely single men. just my 2 cents.

-rebecca
I think the whole lesbian thing negates any maternal credit you may get for being female.

alrighty

Post by **SonomaCat** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:36 pm

I continue to say this not trying to be condescending but just out of fairness -- unless someone knows a lot of gay people, they are probably ill-equipped to opine about gay people.

WYCAT · Post by **WYCAT** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 12:50 pm

Quit chapping my a$$ BAC. I was not opining about gay people but simply responding to Rebecca's comment that gay women are better able to raise a child than a gay man. In fact it was about 95% in jest.

And the part about trying to not be condescending -------- Try a little harder.

Post by **SonomaCat** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 1:04 pm

WYCAT wrote:Quit chapping my a$$ BAC. I was not opining about gay people but simply responding to Rebecca's comment that gay women are better able to raise a child than a gay man. In fact it was about 95% in jest.

And the part about trying to not be condescending -------- Try a little harder.

Didn't realize you were joking ... sorry about that.

I still stand by the statement, but it shouldn't have been posted so soon after your post if you were just making a funny.

briannell · Post by **briannell** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 1:05 pm

i know homosexuals BAC, and have worked with many, in my opinion ONLY, I am not offended/disgusted by the idea of lesbians raising kids. I do object to gay men raising kids. just my 2 cents.

-rebecca

Hell's Bells · Post by **Hell's Bells** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 1:06 pm

Bay Area Cat wrote:
WYCAT wrote:Quit chapping my a$$ BAC. I was not opining about gay people but simply responding to Rebecca's comment that gay women are better able to raise a child than a gay man. In fact it was about 95% in jest.

And the part about trying to not be condescending -------- Try a little harder.
Didn't realize you were joking ... sorry about that.

I still stand by the statement, but it shouldn't have been posted so soon after your post if you were just making a funny.

i thought he was serious 2 brad, if he was making a funny he should have made it obvious that it was a joke

Post by **SonomaCat** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 1:13 pm

briannell wrote:i know homosexuals BAC, and have worked with many, in my opinion ONLY, I am not offended/disgusted by the idea of lesbians raising kids. I do object to gay men raising kids. just my 2 cents.

-rebecca

Rebecca -- I had originally meant that post for WYCAT, prior to figuring out that he wasn't being serious in his post. I know you have more than ample personal relationships with gay people (we've discussed that in the past via email) to have some perspective on the matter. I don't necessarily agree with your position, but I know you are speaking from a perspective of insight, so that post wasn't meant to be speaking to you.

I created a bit too much confusion all around with my vague post.

briannell · Post by **briannell** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 1:25 pm

brad - no biggie, wasn't offended, just responding to the post.

that i know, i'm the only mommy so far reading these post, so my perspective will be vastly different from all the men that like to debate on BN. I've also been home 7 years, so i know from raising both a little boy and girl the different needs as well as what is a focal point. having a mom is required, just don't think two men, no matter how loving can fill the need for a mom in a childs life.

i'm not too sensative on matters, unless your my family, or S.C. and know how to get to me, so feel free to disagree anytime.

it's just different with those people.

-rebecca

WYCAT · Post by **WYCAT** » Wed Jul 27, 2005 1:26 pm

Hell's Bells wrote:
Bay Area Cat wrote:
WYCAT wrote:Quit chapping my a$$ BAC. I was not opining about gay people but simply responding to Rebecca's comment that gay women are better able to raise a child than a gay man. In fact it was about 95% in jest.

And the part about trying to not be condescending -------- Try a little harder.
Didn't realize you were joking ... sorry about that.

I still stand by the statement, but it shouldn't have been posted so soon after your post if you were just making a funny.
i thought he was serious 2 brad, if he was making a funny he should have made it obvious that it was a joke

Sorry Hells and thanks for the suggestion. I will keep that in mind on future posts. Can you ever forgive me?

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